Yakking at Work: A Pregnant Woman's Guide

You made the mistake of drinking (calcium-fortified) O.J. in the morning on a semi-empty stomach. Dry Kix cereal constitutes breakfast, right?

Anyway, O.J., meet Stomach. Gulp gulp gulp. Stomach, give O.J. a dirty look. Stomach is pretty sure that O.J. hit on his girlfriend, or stole his bike, or is a dirty scoundrel (general vibe). Stomach is not happy, and will do everything in his power to kick O.J.'s ass back to where he came from.

Incubator (that's me) to Stomach: "Give him a chance! Don't judge a book by its cover! Can't you just forgive and forget? Don't you remember that girl dumped you anyway, O.J. or no O.J.?"

Stomach, to Incubator: "Shut up you good-for-nothing woman. All you feed me is Cheese-Its and Kix. I want some meat! Potatoes! Diet Coke! I hate you!"

So, you know where this is going... you're now stuck at work, with that familiar feeling in your stomach. That feeling of dread that you'll have to, once again, kneel on the bathroom floor at work, yakking in the community bathroom.

Of course... you have a meeting in fifteen minutes. That you are leading. That you cannot be late for, because your bosses will be in attendance as well. Bosses who don't yet know of your Incubator-status.

Here are some guidelines for other poor unfortunate souls in a similar predicament as mine:
Water speeds up the process. As soon as I know I'm going to yak, when it's the point of no return, but still many minutes (dozens of minutes?) away from the actual act, I head to the bathroom with a bottle of water. If I can chug even a 1/4 of the bottle, I'm bound to make it all come up within the next 1-5 minutes.
Toilet seat liners make excellent bibs. I'm talking backsplash here. NOTHING WORSE than backsplash when you are at work. Backsplash at home is just annoying and inconvenient. But backsplash at work means you walk around smelling like puke, and/or having weird stains on your shirt. Take a toilet seat liner, and make a bib out of it, tucking it into the top of your shirt.
Toilet seat liners can serve multiple purposes. For instance, you don't want to kneel on the floor that dozens of women are in and out of all day, with their nether regions exposed and possible things ending up on the floor? I need not go into more details, right? Take a few toilet seat liners and put them on the floor where you're going to kneel. If you take off your shoes, you'll be even more comfy, as the tops of your feet can lay against the ground, and you can rest your bum on your feet if you need to.
Hair ties make excellent bracelets. Make sure you always have one around your wrist, so you can tie up your hair. Having to hold your hair with a hand or two is most inconvenient.
That bottle of water? That helped get things going? Will be your savior post-yak. You can leave the bathroom somewhat dignified without having to rinse your mouth with the lukewarm water of the sink, in front of everyone.
That's it folks... my tips thus far in my yakking-at-work journey. I can only hope to experience it but a few more times... and I wish the same for you.

P.S. It may require an extra trip back to the bathroom, but don't forget to keep a toothbrush and toothpaste at work! If you don't have cubbies or lockers in the bathroom, at least keep a travel-sized set at your desk or in your purse. This is a must! Gum will do you a disservice, I promise.